“Unconditional love is the core of all truth. When your heart is open, no one is ‘missing’ ”
~ Dr. John F. Demartini ~
“This is not about ‘my story’ I merely wish to give you an understanding of where I have come from. My wish is that this page be a ray of light and hope for you to find your truth. I believe it is possible to shed the old limiting skin and step into a beautiful new way of being…
As a child I was incredibly shy and lacked self confidence. I had no desire to be seen or indeed heard and would not voice an opinion or believe that I had anything worth saying.
My first experience of death came along when I was in my early 20’s – my father who had been fighting cancer, died and I struggled to deal with the pain. I buried the grief and just got on with my life.
In my mid twenties I got married and thought my life was sorted. I had a good job, lovely man, a home and hope. My first born came along and I believed my life was perfect. When my son was just over a year old, the devastating news came that my brother Steve and his wife were killed in a car accident and their son Matthew who was the same age as my son, was also in the car. He had frontal brain damage and was lucky to be alive. But more devastating was that he was now an orphan. Matthew was adopted by his French Aunt and Uncle and started his slow recovery in France with a new loving family.
The pain of this loss was excruciating and utterly devastating. I had no idea how to deal with what I was feeling. Again, I buried the grief, loss and pain and coped the best way I could but was feeling numb, victimized and unloved. I went on to have my second child and tried to be the best mum and wife I could be. However, somewhere I had lost me and my true self. I was living my life for everyone else, trying to be superwoman and keep on smiling through it all.
I coped with life but there was an aching and pain so deep which was a pit of despair that I daren’t acknowledge or touch upon. I had numbed out the pain of the past and there was no real joy in my life. How could this be – I had everything, didn’t I?
There came a point that shook me to my core and I knew things weren’t as rosy as I thought they were. I was standing in my bedroom feeling overwhelmed and stressed by the kids (or that is how I saw it then) and I felt as if I was about to fall of a cliff into my death. The feeling felt so real and it scared me beyond belief. I shouted out in desperation, to whom I had no idea. What I said I can not remember (something like – I have had enough, I can’t do this anymore – help!). I now call this experience ‘the falling’ and know that it was the start of my life changing.
Something heard me (unbeknown to me) and small but significant things started to happen and doors began to open. I walked through the doors and started to discover another way. This way, lead me to start my training as a Holistic Therapist and then subsequently to the other therapies I am trained in.
At last I thought I knew all the answers – NO!
The next stage of my awakening started. My marriage was in tatters and I was still unhappy and lost. Again I questioned – ‘what is wrong with me’. My marriage of 17yrs fell apart and I was now left with a family divided and an ache even deeper than before.
This however, was the beginning of really searching for the truth. My prayer for months on end was ‘Show me the truth’. And boy or boy did it start coming in thick and fast. I was stripped of everything I knew and the only way I can describe it as a re-birth. I started the inner search for me and through the help of some incredible friends, mentors and wise souls began to see the truth.
In my surrendering to the truth, I sent out a clear message. In time the message became clearer and clearer. That message was of love. The love that I experienced was so pure, divine and unconditional. It was the love of all loves – the reflection of my deeper essence and the source of all. I now call this love God, but not in any religious form. A love eternal and from the creator of all.
Peace had finally come into my heart. Forgiveness for my story and all the pain I had created started to melt away. The realisation that, I am already whole and loving, loved and lovable was so beautiful and moving. But also, in this remembering the knowing that everyone is this love too regardless of what they have done or not done.
My training to become a Multi Faith Minister was a complete calling, it was not ever a path I would have chosen – it seemed to have a life of its own. Having been completely non-religious and having no desire what so ever for a religion, it was a little scary to do this training – but I trusted.
The training and experiences were really a return to Love – a beginning of letting Love guide me instead of fear. At last I had come home.
This is what I wish for you to remember too. Your ‘story’ is your own experience but it is not who you are. My hearts desire is to help others find their inner joy, happiness and peace. It is why we are here! Namaste x
“I can’t recommend Ann-Marie enough. I’ve been to her meditations, psychic development groups, angel workshops and had 1-2-1’s and you know you’re going to have a great time in a space that’s brimming with love, it’s always magical. Most recently I did her vision board workshop and wow wee within days everything I asked for started happening, it was so powerful. I can’t wait for the next workshop” Natalie P. x x x
‘I’d reached a point in my life where I knew I had issues relating to my childhood that were holding me back and restricting my quality of life, causing me to carry a knot of anxiety around in my stomach… I saw Ann-Marie over a period of time and she helped me to address my fears and look at and heal my past in a serene and safe environment. My relationships began to change and I became happier, stronger with more sense of myself and the world around me and this in turn enabled me to let go and trust life. Furthermore as I cast off the shackles of my past I feel more contented, self sufficient and happier than I ever believed possible. I no longer experience the panic, fear and hopelessness of the past as I now have a set of coping mechanisms to support me. Ann-Marie has been a huge support, loving, encouraging friend and true inspiration to me. I no longer have a knot of fear in my stomach – instead I feel butterflies of excitement and life is expanding and getting better and better’. Julie x
“I feel as if the weight of the whole world has been lifted from my shoulders. Ann-Marie has helped me to deal with my anxieties and insecurities in the most sensitive and caring way, which has helped me to love and value myself, and my life, in a way that I haven’t done since my happy childhood days. Thank you Ann-Marie!” Gemma from Sussex
“I wanted to say how much I love reading your newsletters and how inspirational I find you and how much I enjoy the very authentic sharing of your wisdom. Receiving your newsletters is like the anticipation of opening a good book, and feels very luxurious and comforting as well as thought provoking.” Caroline from Scotland
“To see your drama clearly is to be liberated from it”
~ Ken Keyes,Jr. ~