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My Story

Why I do what I do ……. 

I now stand proud, strong and certain in my message to the world and that awakening journey from lack, grief and playing small (fear) to LOVE, is how I want to inspire and help others….

So, there I was the former me – shy, inferior, quiet, ‘good girl’ with no desire to be noticed or in the limelight at all and like many of us, I had learnt these ways and became a diligent student of perfectionism and politeness and consequently lost the ability to have my own opinion or any sense of authentic self-expression.

I kept a low profile in life, had no great ambition or desire to achieve much in particular and once I left school went to catering college and used my skills in the kitchen as my career. 

Age 22 I lost my father to cancer and although it was a difficult time I did not express my feelings or emotions as I had no awareness of how to do this. The grief was pushed away and I got on with life… I met a wonderful man and married at 27 which resulted in two beautiful children – I thought my life was complete…..

However, under the surface there was a slow but consistent unease and dissatisfaction – but I didn’t know why. Then came the 3 main turning points in my life:

  1. The death of my brother and his partner in a car accident.
  2. The break down of my 18yr marriage.
  3. My spiritual awakening.

The first real thing that brought me to my knees what no 1……  nothing could have prepared me for this and absolutely nothing made sense anymore. I felt broken beyond words – unable to feel – and totally stuck in grief with nowhere to take it. It joined all the other grief, pain and anger, festering away like a time bomb…

Suppressing my feelings and hiding, inevitably had an affect on my marriage too and although I adored and loved this man, things somehow just weren’t quite right. To the outside world we had it all and in the eyes of a conventional marriage we did.

Eventually when I chose to look at my stuff, I became aware that I had attracted a codependent relationship and the rigors of being disconnected to feelings, emotions or my Source ended in the only logical outcome – a divorce and might I add, the most painful experience of my life. The time bomb had gone off !

My spiritual awakening was not something I had consciously been looking for but was something that had responded to my inner desperate cry for help. Little by little, as I became willing to look beyond my story and into the heart of truth, the right teacher would appear, the right book the right words and eventually I began to make sense of life. I began to ask the only meaningful questions: Who am I? What am I doing here? Show me the truth!!! I had surrendered and at last peace, joy and love started to replace the illusions and nightmare I had created. I began to remember who I truly was.

I sometimes fondly remember that ‘shy one’ and all I have for her now is deep love, acceptance and appreciation for who she was. She is now so free, alive, innocent and beautiful…… and always was. I took my ‘story’ and turned it around – I came to know the truth.

And that is why I do what I do  and I have chosen to help those who are ready to awaken to the truth too. It is my delight to support, inspire and remind people of the utter joy, abundance, vitality, ease, passion, freedom and love that is but a heartbeat away….. I look forward to walking the path with you and finding a space for your own grace to emerge…

With love Ann-Marie x